One really wants to take a shower after listening to Mike Huckabee’s interview with Trump for Newsmax. We are only bringing you the three-minute portion posted up to the net, but about one-quarter of the way through it one honestly wants to ask them if they should just get a room together. We would all be more comfortable.

Did you know that prior to Donald Trump being president, no one ever said Merry Christmas? The phrase hadn’t been invented and it was a felony to invent it! They all said “Happy Holidays.” It is true, and some of us thought we said “Happy Holidays” because it was easier than listing each one because there were holidays, from many denominations including Thanksgiving, Hanukka, Yule (Solstice), Christmas Eve, Christmas, New Year’s Eve, New Years Day, the entire period seemed to include “Happy Holidays” to some of us.

But Donald Trump saved America. People now say Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas Eve everyone! A look back when President Barack Obama & First Lady Michelle Obama gave their last Christmas address to the nation from the White House in 2016. #MerryChristmas #ChristmasEve #MerryChristmasEve #MerryChristmas2019 https://t.co/Srkx3ud1fl

— Matt Leeds (@Mleeds2048) December 25, 2019

No, that was not Michelle and Barack Obama saying Merry Christmas in 2016 just like they’d said since 2009. NO ONE SAID MERRY CHRISTMAS until Trump became president, got it. Don’t believe your lying eyes and ears and brain and colon!

Trump also wants you to know that all Americans love Christmas, “Americans, Jewish people, Muslims, everyone loves Christmas.”

The interview then goes into how the world was perfect under Trump. The price of gas was 25 cents per gallon and now it’s $21.60 in California (we might have heard that wrong), we were 100% energy-independent, but no more, now we rely on OPEC and just STFU about world markets and sending oil from Houston to Brazil and importing it from Nigeria because prices are always fluctuating in a global market, just STFU! We got all our energy here, in America, when Trump was president.

Now, everyone is saying, “I wish Trump was president.” Everyone is saying, even you, too – you just won’t admit it! Because everything so obviously sucks now! Stuff costs more! And STFU about the global economy and supply chain problems. It’s because of Biden! And STFU about how that extra $750 sure helps parents with three kids when things cost more, maybe even makes up for it entirely! Just shut up!

It was better and now everyone knows it is better and Trump fully agrees. Trump couldn’t agree more…

Shower time, and do NOT picture these two in a room together, no matter how strong the undertones to this might be…

"Mr. President, I want to say, because of you, a lot of Americans have had some great Christmases." — Mike Huckabee to Trump #NotACult pic.twitter.com/NQvshit7cF

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) December 16, 2021

There. See? The world was perfect and everyone was happy, it rained money, everyone liked their job, there was not a single divorce filed while Trump was president, women ovulated later in life, men spent more time with their wives, children obeyed their parents, and said their prayers before bed, just like St. Trump, I mean, “Mr. President Trump, sir!“………

Fck Trump, and Huckabee. In fact, we bet they got that room…

Twitter had some thoughts:

I've worked retail for 40 years. I have never had management tell me I couldn't say "Merry Christmas". I've never had a customer get upset over "Merry Christmas". Not once.

"The War On Christmas" is a total fcking myth.

— Tahoe_Gal (@gal_tahoe) December 16, 2021

"gas prices are eleventy billion dollars a gallon and when I was president gas was free and coming out of fountains everywhere and people came up to me weeping saying they had enough gas to get to the stores to say merry christmas and now there's no gas and santa is dead"

— Vax it up. (@Disasterdude_VT) December 16, 2021

Nooooot quite "Bless our Holy Leader, who makes the crops grow high and eats the sun every night," but it's pretty darn close

— Skot Christopherson (@SkotChristopher) December 16, 2021

I remember during the Obama reign when I accidentally said Merry Christmas to a Target store clerk and was hauled in and sent to a reeducation camp

— William Buecker (@wcbuecker) December 16, 2021

I once said Merry Christmas at a big chain store. First the cashier tackled me, the manager came and hog tied me, then security came. Obama’s feds came and got me. I spent 7 years in GitMo. Thank goodness for Trump ending the war on Christmas.

— OFFarmer Handmaid of Jamey (@sarajaynestaten) December 16, 2021

Dear Mr. Trump, my now and forever President,

I just wanted to thank you for your visage, your dreamy eyes, and your crinkly smile. Without you, there is no Christmas or anything to celebrate.

Now and always,
Your faithful servant

— Emily (@EliTheAverage) December 16, 2021

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[email protected] and on Substack: Pence Person of the Year

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