We are at a loss.

We have seen Trump sound worse. There have been times he’s slurred more words. There have been times when he looked redder and that his veins might pop out of his head. He has been more obsessed about the election before (though that is a closer call). And he’s certainly been angrier and more obsessed with Obama, Hillary, and “sleepy Joe.” But honest to all the dogs in heaven, Trump has never once had a harder time keeping a thought straight in his head.

We wanted to write a column about Trump taking on a presidential duty (probably illegally) by sending a direct message to every border patrol agent, every ICE officer, every… We were positive that Trump was going to order them to do something or give himself some sort of presidential authority to direct the federal employees. It would have been a massive and important story.

We say “would have” because in the middle of the sentence – and this is not hyperbole – he mentioned something about Texas and within the next few words he was talking about windmills and the noise that windmills make, they reduce property values, that all windmills are made in Germany (Which will come as news to hundreds of thousands of people in red-state America.) He stopped halfway through a message to federal immigration officials to move on to windmills and how it’s awful to have them around. We presume he’s never lived next to a refinery.

In the entirety of this speech, Trump was only able to articular one clear thought, beginning to end, and thankfully, it was an admission that will help him get convicted by the Manhattan D.A.’s office:

"You didn’t pay tax on the car or a company apartment…you didn’t pay tax, or education for your grandchildren — I, don’t even know what do you have to put? Does anybody know the answer to that stuff?"

Prosecutors call this an admission… pic.twitter.com/3Myuzy0cB9

— Andrew Feinberg (@AndrewFeinberg) July 4, 2021

He made that statement in and among complaining that no one ever arrested Hillary, while also complaining about political prosecution. He couldn’t process that he was claiming he was being politically prosecuted while at the same time complaining that Hillary wasn’t politically prosecuted.

Trump complains that “they didn’t go after Hillary Clinton and her foundation” pic.twitter.com/VBF0QaHNKq

— Acyn (@Acyn) July 4, 2021

This came out of the middle of nowhere, none, he was talking about the election when this came out:

Trump: Who shot Ashli Babbitt? pic.twitter.com/TeM1uZ8e2K

— Acyn (@Acyn) July 4, 2021

The answer is a police officer or Secret Service agent, one that is seen on video warning the people at the door at least five times to move back, which is far more warning than any black man gets.

At one point, Trump even noted that his very good friend Matt Gaetz was in the crowd, evidently unable to comprehend that claiming close friendship with Matt Gaetz right now is a bad idea.

Matt Gaetz is in Sarasota. At the "rally." Yammering against attorney's advice. Trying not to ogle women. Unmasked and uncouth. With wet hair (he's a foot smaller like that.) Proving that just because you have a large forehead, you don't necessarily have a large brain.

— Duty To Warn 🔉 (@duty2warn) July 3, 2021

We have no idea what this means unless by “ancestors” he means his father’s generation, which did crush fascism in Europe that did look a lot like what Trump is building here today. But that’s generally not what people mean by “ancestors.”

Trump: Our ancestors crust, just absolutely crushed fascism pic.twitter.com/A2w7prWh0j

— Acyn (@Acyn) July 4, 2021

Maybe he’s just out of practice? Or maybe this is the new normal? Maybe he couldn’t give a fck about an actual message and just wanted to stand in front of an adoring crowd and scream sentence fragments that didn’t remotely relate to each other, we don’t know. He wasn’t as drugged (allegedly), he wasn’t as sweaty, he wasn’t as hyper, he wasn’t as combative, none of the usual issues stuck out. But wow, this guy has never had more trouble keeping a single thought in his head.

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