Want to hear something crazy? The vaccine can make women pass blood. No, no, not the woman getting the vaccine, women near the woman getting the vaccine.

We know this because MAGA actress Krystal Tini says it’s happening to her and others. Now, given that we’re writing for liberals, we know our readers can handle the scientific nuance in this. Generally, when people speak of “passing blood” they mean through their G.I. tract and it’s a serious condition. But Kyrstal is a woman, and she is referring to gynecological problems.

See? When people are A) Adults, and B) Scientifically literate, one can talk about issues that might “gross” out some or cause even dumber people to giggle and do it objectively, laughing only at Krystal and the MAGAs.

Now, MAGAs say insane sh*t all the time, so we’ve become numb to it. But we really need you to sit back and consider this because it’s so stupid that the average cat would roll over on its back laughing its ass off.

Think about what would have to happen for this to be true. The vaccine must contain some kind of chemical or biological reagent that doesn’t impact the recipient (or very very rarely, rare enough, it could be misinterpreted) and that sounds like something that would be reported as a problem, even by liberals.

Therefore, the vaccine recipient’s body is not susceptible to gynecological bleeding, so it would have to convert an inactive chemical into an active one, or hormone that A) Still doesn’t cause the vaccinated person to bleed, but, either through the skin or breath or some sort of contact, and does cause Krystal to pass blood.

Drink that in.

If Kyrstal was going to say something this stupid, why wouldn’t she add to it to make it even cooler (dumber) and say it makes her pass bat blood or lavender blood. Is she telling a story or is she trying out a new screenplay through the media?

And no, she won’t talk to her doctor about it because the doctor will say she’s crazy. In other words, Krystal has already decided she is right and the doctor would be wrong. Besides, Krystal has done her own research. She has read The Lancet, the New England Journal, JAMA, the usual peer-reviewed scientific stuff – we’re sure. So take that, doctors!

Anti-vaccine actress Krystal Tini claims that she begins passing blood whenever she spends any time around vaccinated people. She says she won’t talk to a doctor about it because they will just say she is crazy, and it isn’t necessary since she already has done her own research. pic.twitter.com/i2VIi1xOPe

— Ron Filipkowski (@RonFilipkowski) January 4, 2022

If she’s done her own research then she should be able to explain what is causing this and why. She should be able to call a press conference and expose the CDC’s lies, demonstrating the exact chemical-hormonal mechanism by which she’s having this problem, how its transmitted, and its potential dangers.

Now, again – we are not doctors, but given that Kyrstal looks like she is between the age of 13 to 45, we think we know one cause that should be ruled out, first.

Furthermore, given that she’s closer to 45 than she is to 13, perhaps a very very common condition – one that does need to be kept in check – should be ruled out, again? Because, whether Kyrstal knows this or not, there are other things that can cause what she’s describing and some are more dangerous than proximity to a vaccinated person. Krystal may or may not know this, but because there are multiple conditions that can cause spotting, even the doctors may not know the exact cause at first and must run things called “tests” (a less fancy name for “research.”)

And since none of us are afraid of science, we know we can say this without anyone thinking of it as a joke. We hate to inform Kyrstal that unless she’s done her own gynecological exam, rented laboratory equipment, and then got some extremely intense pathology training, packing five years into five weeks, she actually hasn’t done her own research, she has done a “search,” probably on Google, and there’s a key distinction.

Because we are writers the last sentence can be considered expert opinion.

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